Notes App - The Lunar Times

NYC Mask Mandate Won’t Stop Cuomo From Touching You

How is he still touching me if I’m 6 feet away?

By: K. Cheng

Notes App Andal Paul

Wakey Wakey Bitch! It’s Your Office Commute

You, me, and merge lane traffic will be reunited very soon…

By: Andal Paul

Japan Overcomes China in Olympic Ping Pong, Stereotype Remains Unchanged

Japan Upsets China and All of Asian-America

By: Victor Tran

‘If It Wasn’t for These Cardboard Beds, I’d Be Getting So Laid,’ Says Olympic Speed Walker

‘The same thing happened to me back in 2016’

By: Ian Yamamoto

Notes App Grant Yang

BREAKING: Mom Texts With Thumbs Now

She also started using the skull emoji

By: Grant Yang

Notes App Grant Yang

Jeff Bezos Steps Down as Amazon CEO, Then Steps Up, Slides to the Right, One Hop This Time

Now Jeff is doing a reverse, reverse! Everybody clap your hands!

By: Grant Yang

Arizona Sushi Roll Just California Roll Covered In Sand

Check out the Delaware roll (Philadelphia roll with Joe Biden’s picture on it)

By: Ken Taro Ward

Notes App Grant Yang

Weird Ringing in Dream Sounds Just Like Phone Alarm

I mean everybody else hears that too right?

By: Grant Yang

Notes App Grant Yang

Impossible! Group of Gossiping Aunties Aren’t Talking Shit About You

Scientists say it’s more likely to be struck by literally a hundred bolts of lightning

By: Grant Yang

Michael Richards Tells Tony Hinchcliffe, “Too Far, Man”

“Even Shane Gillis jumped in with some friendly advice.”

By: Victor Tran, Misha Han