Asian Farmer Drowning in Pussy, Thanks Cast of Minari

“Steven Yeun ran, so we could get laid”

April 26, 2021

LITTLE ROCK – Arkansas native, premier sweet potato farmer, radish caretaker, and loving single father, Tony Park, raves about Minari. “I’ve never been so touched by a movie”, says Park. “Literally, I’m having a bunch of sex because of it.” Minari, a film about a Korean farmer in Arkansas, has created a phenomenon called “Yellow Hay Fever” – causing white, rural women to have sex with Asian men.

Park shared that the newfound lust from white women has caused him quite a bit of strife, “I’m only doing farm work at night because women just flock to me at all hours of the day. I’ve pulled the kids out of school because white women will follow them home, knowing I’d be there. The only upside is that a couple of the white women have stuck around to not get laid but instead help out of the farm. We have a weekly lawn mower now, free of charge.”

Mr. Park plans to enjoy the fruit of Minari’s labor for as long as he can. Will “Yellow Hay Fever” subside? “Maybe,” says Park. “But Shang-Chi comes out in September, so I’m hoping that means we’ll have extra hands for the sweet potato harvest.”