White Man Forgets to Include Asians While Virtue Signaling About Race Again
March 7, 2021
“Aren’t Asians just honorary whites? I voted for Biden.”
CHICAGO – Parker Williams, a student at Loyola University, delivered a presentation on a Zoom call for a class about diversity and race relations. After the call, the professor informed him that he hadn’t mentioned Asians.
“Look, there are so many minority groups to account for. As a white man, I find it exhausting. For now, we need to focus on Black people, and I guess some brown people because honestly, it’s all my mind can handle,” said Williams, a senior majoring in sociology. “I’m certainly doing my part. I used a black square as my Facebook profile picture for a whole week. I even went to a BLM protest over the summer. Sure, I was only there for 15 minutes and then left to get some froyo, but I was there long enough to post a video on Instagram. Don’t worry, I included all the hashtags too.”
Professor of the course, Dr. Prisha Banerjee, reminded Williams of the stark increase in anti-asian related hate crimes in the US.
“I mean, aren’t Asians just honorary whites? Sure they have some minor struggles here and there, but just like us whites, we’re inconvenienced at times too. Besides, I voted for Biden. I wouldn’t even have minded if Andrew Yang had won.”
Dr. Banerjee summarized the situation.
“This whole situation is pretty ironic considering this is an Asian American studies class,” said Dr. Banerjee. “I mean, he’s completely missing the fact that there are brown asians, including myself. His attitude is particularly concerning since I had mentioned the rise of anti-asian hate crimes as result of COVID-19. Parker’s scenario here is a prime example of white virtue signaling; too bad I’ll have to see him again once I fail him this semester.”
Aaron Kim, a Korean American student in the class, gave his thoughts.
“Before Williams joined the call, I heard him speaking with some of the other students. He was talking about how his cousin got the ‘Kung Flu,’” said Kim. “Not to mention, he was wearing a Naruto shirt. I’m also pretty sure I saw a waifu pillow on his bed.”
Williams confirmed that he does indeed own a waifu pillow. He bought it after he broke-up with his third girlfriend, a Japanese exchange student, and before he got together with his fourth girlfriend, a Singaporean exchange student.
