Lifestyle

Mom Wishes You’d Be More Like Your Older Brother and Stop Comparing Yourself to Others

She keeps asking why I have ‘insecurities’

September 26, 2022

By: Neel Bhakta

NEW ORLEANS — Local Asian mother of 2 and advocate for mental health has come under fire after recently advising her youngest son to stop comparing himself to other people like his older, much better brother, perplexed sources confirmed. 

“Look, I’m a huge believer in mental health, especially for the younger generation. I see how much my youngest son struggles and just can’t help but imagine how much more successful he’d be if he was chill like his older brother,” said mother of 2 Cindy Duong. “I’ve always told my sons, don’t compare yourself to others. Well, actually, it’s something I learned from our next door neighbor with married children, two Volkswagens, and 200 more Facebook friends than me. But, that’s not what’s important here,” said the downcast mother.

Kevin Duong, the youngest of the family, was confused by the advice from his mother.

“Yeah, what the fuck does that mean? I tried explaining to my mom that’s an oxymoron but she told me to stop thinking about laundry detergent and start finding a wife before I die of diabetes,” said the completely healthy 20 year old. “And look, if I were to hypothetically compare myself to my brother, surely I’d be coming out on top. He should be compared to me,” said a scorned Kevin Duong. 

“Between the both of us, there’s only one person who was crowned best yo-yoer in the tri-state area,” said the proud dweeb. 

At press time, the eldest brother was just happy his family acknowledged his existence.